Gangsta'

Baggy jeans to your knees showing your underwear,
your pimp walk,
your slang talk,
your new kicks,
your fake bling…
Brother; all of that don’t mean a thang

You think you’re the man?

You think you’re gangsta’?

Brother, you have no clue.

Try being a father to your kids, a faithful lover to your woman, a provider and protector for your family,

Now that’s GANGSTA’

Why Won't He Marry Me?

You've been with your guy for 5,6,7 years or more; you have kids together, you live together. Then what seems to be the problem? How come he hasn't asked you to marry him? Is he just afraid of commitment? Well, in some way he has committed to you by living with you, there's just that one missing piece, that ever elusive marriage.
In my parents' generations it would have been unheard of for a man and woman to live together never mind have kids out of wedlock, you would have been viewed as a social outcast.
However, in 2009 this is commonplace in our culture, it's basically accepted as the norm.
I guess my real question to the ladies is what's the point of getting married if you're living like a married couple anyway? Does the marriage certificate make your relationship any more valid than it is now? Why is it that the national divorce rate is growing higher every year but couples that live together but are not married have better success?

One piece of insight I have for you ladies is that men are creatures of habit. If you allow them to get comfortable they will want to stay that way for the foreseeable future.

In other words if you want a future with your guy then you have to make him uncomfortable, make him work for whatever he gets. If he asks you to move in together tell him no. A guy has a live-in girlfriend that cooks and cleans for him then why bother getting married he already has what he needs from you. It goes back to the old adage, "why buy the cow when you already have the milk at home?" No I'm not calling women cows...I'm just sayin'...

Oh, and one more thing..don't give an ultimatum to anyone, especially not to a guy. Trust me on this one it will backfire and blow up in your face.

In this day and age is marriage all it's cracked up to be?

African Men Better Than African-American Men?

Found an interesting article that all black men should certainly take a look it.

Now in full and fair disclosure I am African and grew up in a very strict African household and I do agree with most of this article.

Remember this article was not written by me so please no personal attacks and take it with a grain of salt.

I would appreciate your thoughts and comments.

http://www.topix.com/forum/afam/TFFC9OEBB8MSRDTDQ

It's Your Fault Men Cheat? by Men Are Speaking.com

Today's parents are raising their little boys to be "palyas" and cheaters...

Why can little Johnny in 3rd grade come home, tell his parents that he has 3 girlfriends and get applause? The parents make comments like "that's my boy" or "he is going to have all the girls chasing him"

If it were little Jennifer coming home saying these things her parents would be outraged. They would want to run an intervention. She would be told "that is not how proper ladies act and you should not be thinking about boys until you're 35 years old."

As little boys grow into men they carry this same mentality through life. It's okay to have multiple relationships at the same time, it's okay to lie to your women and they see this as a rite of passage into manhood, they wear this badge of honor proudly on their chest.

Here's an even better question.

Why are women so forgiving and willing to take back cheating men time and time again? , (and you know who you are so don't try to hide the fact.) Is it because women have come to expect less and less from their relationships? Have women lowered their standards permanently? When a man gets cheated on he often doesn't give out second chances, is the male ego that fragile or are we just selfish?

In today's society is there such a thing as a monogamous relationship anymore?

The TellTale Heart by Men Are Speaking.com

Ok, now that we've explored jealousy in realtionships I think it's appripriate to talk about when your suspicions are confirmed. WHEN THEY CHEAT!!! (insert dramatic music here)
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When you think that your partner is having an affair, you begin looking for different signs of cheating. The trouble is, what is innocent behavior and what is really a sign that something is going on?

You can use this information for what's it's worth so "ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK"



Some of these signs of cheating are "tongue in cheek" while others are tell-tale signs that commonly appear with a cheating husband or cheating wife.
1) You find birth-control pills in her medicine cabinet, and you've had a vasectomy. (DUH)
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2) Mutual friends start acting strangely toward you. (They either know about the cheating or have been told stories about what a horrible wife or girlfriend you are.)
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3) Your cheating husband or wife stops confiding in you and seeking advice from you.
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4) Sets up a new e-mail account and doesn't tell you about it.
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5) He leaves the house in the morning smelling like Irish Spring and returns in the evening smelling like Safeguard.
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6) She joins the gym and begins a rigorous workout program.
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7) She buys a cell phone and doesn't let you know.
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8) He sets up a separate cell phone account that is billed to his office.
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9) The cheating husband carries condoms, and you are on the pill.
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10) Begins to delete all incoming phone calls from the caller ID.
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11) Deletes all incoming e-mails when they used to accumulate.
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12) He becomes "accusatory," asking if you are being true to him, usually out of guilt.
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13) Raises hypothetical questions such as, "Do you think it's possible to love more than one person at a time?"
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14) He buys himself new underwear.
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15) He insists the child seat, toys, etc., are kept out of his car.
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16) The cheating wife stops wearing her wedding ring.
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17) Has a sudden desire to be helpful with the laundry.
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18) Has unexplained scratches or bruises on his or her neck or back.
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19) Suddenly wants to try new love techniques.
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20) He/she fairly suddenly stops having sex with you.
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21) He/she suddenly wants more sex, more often.
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22) Supposedly works a lot of overtime, but it never shows up on the pay stub.
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23) Picks fights in order to stomp out of the house.
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24) You find out by accident he or she took vacation day or personal time off from work - but supposedly worked on those days.
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25) Shows a sudden interest in a different type of music.
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26) Spouse's co-workers are uncomfortable in your presence.
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27) Has a sudden preoccupation with his or her appearance.
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28) Spends an excessive amount of time on the computer, especially after you have gone to bed.
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29) He throws up a lot because he just ate at his mistress's house and had to eat the dinner you prepared when he got home.
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30) Your spouse is away from home, either nights or on trips, more than previously.
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31) His/her clothes smell of an unfamiliar perfume or after-shave. You see lipstick on your husband's shirt.
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32) The amount of money being deposited into your checking account drops off.
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33) You find items of intimate apparel or other small gift-type items that you did not give your spouse.
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34) Your spouse seems less comfortable around you and is "touchy" and easily moved to anger.
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35) You get calls where the caller hangs up when he or she hears your voice.
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36) He/she loses attention in the activities in the home.
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37) Your intuition (gut feeling) tells you that something is not right.
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38) He/she has a definite change in attitude towards everyone in the home.
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39) She uses a low voice or whisper on the phone or hangs up quickly.
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40) She has a "glow" about her.
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41) Atypical erratic behavior.
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42) He sneaks out of the house.
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43) She sleeps with her purse by the bed
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44) She goes to the store for groceries and comes home 5 hours later.
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45) He tells you can get hold of him at a different telephone number.
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46) The telltale signs of a cheating spouse? Having to ask that question in the first place.

Well I hope this opened some eyes and I look forward to hearing your comments...

Follow me www.menarespeaking.com

The Green Eyed Monster by Men Are Speaking.com

Jealousy really has no place in any relationship. If you want to be the one woman your man is crazy about, shelf all of your feelings of jealousy. What most women don't realize is that when you express jealousy you're actually making a fairly bold statement about yourself. If you're jealous of another woman, you're suggesting that you're not confident with yourself.
What men want in a woman is someone who is very self assured. Never let him see you jealous and never tell him that you don't want him hanging out with female friends or co-workers. If he feels that you trust him, he'll love you even more.

What Men Really Want But Won't Tell You Episode 5

He lets himself go when you do...
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He’ll probably never tell you, but your guy doesn’t adore you regardless of how you look, especially when it comes to weight gain (except pregnancy) or letting your appearance slip. If you stop hitting the gym, trade those short skirts that won his heart for frumpy sweats, or no longer bother to style your hair, he’ll still love you, but odds are he’ll long for the old you. He might even wonder if you’ve stopped caring about him if you stop caring about how you look when he’s with you. Ask if he thinks you look fat, he’ll lie to avoid hurting you, though he may let you know in more subtle ways. Remember, the way you looked when he fell in love with you is the way he wants you to stay forever.
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Lesson learned: Never take for granted the importance of physical attraction in your relationship. Look good for your guy, and you’ll feel better about yourself. And more self-confidence means you’ll have a happier and sexier relationship. He’ll probably work harder to keep himself fit and attractive for you, too.